Giving your dog a choice

We often think that when we give choice to our dogs, they just won’t do anything that we would like them to do. But from my experience, the more choice you give them, the more likely they will be to spend time with you.

Designed by Freepik

Let me share a story with you. My aunt happens to also be my dentist but it didn’t make me less scared of pain. What changed the experience of going to a dentist entirely was the fact that at the very beginning she always said: when it gets too painful or uncomfortable, just make a noise and I will stop whatever I’m doing. And of course, as a start I tested it. A couple of times really. To my surprise, she always honoured my request and stopped whatever she was doing. She then waited for me to say 'ok, continue'. From now on the fear started to get smaller and smaller. I knew that I have a choice. It empowered me and made me more likely to come to her, even for a simple check. I didn’t wait for the pain to show as a prompt to go to the dentist. I had a voice and I knew that if I will get too much pain – I can just ask her to stop and she will.

We can use the same principles with our dogs. We can give them a choice and a way for them to tell us: ‘please stop’ as well as ‘ok, continue’. That will not only strengthen the bond between you and your dog, it will also empower him. Let’s take an example of coat brushing. To give your dog a choice, try this:

1) when your dog moves away – you move the brush away,

2) when your dog stays - you continue to brush gently. Follow a couple of brushes with a little bit of his favourite treat to make it into a fun game.

When you truly honour his request to stop what you do, your dog will eventually learn that there is nothing to be afraid of. You are reliable and he can ask you to stop brushing or he can choose to stay with you to get your attention and/or a tasty treat. It won't happen overnight but with a little bit of daily, short practice you will see a change you never imagined happening.

Be a superhero for your dog – he will love you for it.