How to live a happy life with your pet?
I already wrote about a good enough concept. I wrote about being with the animal in front of you and not the one in your head. I also recommend to let the dog be dog.
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In all this, one might think that I'm suggesting putting animal trainers out of business as the solutions to live a happy life with your pet is to accept him as he is. That's not quite true! My suggestion to accept the pet you have in front of you doesn't mean that you can't try to change things if something doesn't work for both of you. It's about prioritising the most important things and letting go of the rest.
One of the examples could be, accepting that your dog pulls you on the walks. Interestingly enough, that's the behaviour I have the most experience with and I love to work on loose leash walking but at the same time, I prefer to let the dog be dog and allow them to enjoy their walks.
Nancy Tacker, talking about good enough concept at the Woof conference, was saying "If it's not a problem for you, it's not a problem". Ask yourself, is it a problem for you that your dog pulls you? It might be! If you have a very strong dog and you are afraid that he will run loose and jump on a busy street - that is a real concern which can be addressed by a dog trainer. If the only reason you are thinking about changing this behaviour is that someone told you "you should have a well-behaved dog", examine, what is important for you? It can be a case that hearing snarky comments from people on your walks, who judge you and your dog, can be a source of stress. People still believe that if the dog pulls then he "doesn't respect you" or tries to acquire "an alpha status". None of this is true, your dog simply behaves in a way that was reinforced. Getting faster to an interesting smell is getting him what he was after so the pulling gets reinforced. It has nothing to do with you or your status. However, if it's a source of big distress in your life, you can teach your dog to walk by your leg. It will be a process but once you learn what to do, you will see progress immediately. It all depends on you and your needs, would you rather invest in the process of teaching or would you learn to accept the dog that you have?
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I remember how excited we were when my beloved husky started to howl. It became a party trick and everyone wanted to hear him do that. As soon as we started to make weird, prolonged noises, he was joining in. Yet, at some point, he started to join in for the sound of the telephone or intercom. And he was loud! You couldn’t hear anything from the other side of the phone. The behaviour that in one case was a source of fun for everybody, became problematic in others. Did we change that? No, we just decided to live with it. It was a bit annoying but still kind of cute :)
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The same thing is with cats. I've been to many houses where the whole house just became a big playground for the cat. I see absolutely nothing wrong with this! There will be people who see it as nuisance and would prefer the cat to at least stay in his bed instead of on the table while people are eating. If so, you can teach that positively. Keep reinforcing him for staying on his bed while you eat and he will eventually stay there instead of putting his face on your plate. Is it something that you have to do? Absolutely not! If it doesn't bother you, who cares what other people think?
Some cats can be very vocal. It can be annoying but also it can serve a great purpose for both. Cats can tell you when they want you to open the doors for them. They can announce themselves into the room (I find it incredibly cute!) or tell you they are hungry. Yes, it can be annoying but aren’t we annoying when we can’t stop talking? You can accept the cat that you have and it can be easier than trying to change him.
Be a Superhero for your pet, he will love you for it!
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